Jez Higgins

Freelance software grandad
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Warming Up - Whilst his mum was buying the drinks, Paddy and I found some seats and ended up sitting next to two pretty young women in their early twenties. I realised that a five year old boy is quite a good wingman to have if you are interested in talking to women ... within minutes Paddy (and by proxy me) were friends with two hot women ... if I had Paddy in tow with me everywhere I went then I would meet a lot of women and maybe manage to get a girlfriend by exploiting his cuteness and lack of shyness ... Shamefully I said that for the plan to work though I would have to pretend to be Paddy's dad and for it to really work we'd have to say that his mummy was dead. Paddy, God bless him, completely bought into the scheme, acting out what he'd do, hugging me and saying "I love you daddy!" and adding "I miss mummy" and with my prompting, "But daddy has looked after me so well." I don't think a woman on earth would be able to resist the allure of this
It's all true, I've experienced it, I've done the comedy routine - "... and if I were to lean in and say 'sadly, his mother died in childbirth', they'd shag me there in the street".
If not for the fact that Richard Herring and I have never met, I'd say he stole this bit from me.



Jez Higgins

Freelance software grandad
software created
extended or repaired

Follow me on Mastodon
Applications, Libraries, Code
Talks & Presentations

Hire me
Contact

Older posts are available in the archive or through tags.

Feed